Birth Trauma
Understanding Birth Trauma
Birth does not always unfold the way you hoped or expected. For some mothers, the experience can feel frightening, overwhelming, or out of control, leaving moments that stay vivid long after the birth itself. You may find yourself replaying parts of the experience, feeling panicked or tearful when something reminds you of it, or struggling to talk about what happened without becoming overwhelmed.
Birth trauma can show up in many ways. You might avoid thinking about the birth altogether, feel on edge with your baby in ways you cannot explain, or notice guilt and shame creeping in even though you know you did nothing wrong. Some mothers describe feeling disconnected from themselves or their bodies, unable to shake a sense of having been unheard, dismissed, or powerless.
If this is your experience, please know that you are not alone, and that what happened matters. Birth trauma is more common than many people realise, and the emotional impact can be long-lasting if left unprocessed. With the right support, these memories can be understood, soothed, and integrated so they no longer have the same hold over your everyday life.
How Therapy Can Help
Therapy gives you a safe and steady space to revisit the birth at your own pace, without being rushed, judged, or told to “move on.” We begin by making sense of what happened, how it felt in the moment, and how it continues to affect you now, whether through flashbacks, anxiety, guilt, or a sense of disconnect from your baby or yourself.
For many women, birth trauma holds experiences that felt overwhelming or unfinished. This is where approaches like EMDR and Schema Therapy-informed work can be especially helpful. EMDR allows us to gently reprocess the moments that feel stuck, so the memory becomes less charged and no longer triggers the same emotional or physical reaction. Schema work helps us explore any beliefs that formed around the experience, such as “I failed,” “I had no control,” or “something bad will happen again,” and begin to soften them.
Throughout therapy, you will be supported to understand your reactions, reconnect with your sense of safety, and build a more compassionate narrative about what you went through. Over time, many mothers notice they can think about the birth with far less distress, feel more present with their baby, and reclaim a sense of confidence and trust in themselves.
Taking the Next Step
It is very common for mothers who struggle with guilt and perfectionism to hesitate before seeking help. You might worry that reaching out will be seen as weakness, or that you should be able to push through on your own. If that thought is familiar, please know that wanting support is not a failing, it is a sign of care, both for yourself and for your family.
To make the first step easier, I offer a free 15-minute video call. This is simply a chance for us to meet, talk about what feels hardest for you right now, and explore whether working together feels like the right fit. There is no commitment and no expectation, just a space to see if therapy feels supportive for you.
If you would like to begin, you can use the button below to arrange your free call.